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Strange and mysterious sounds from the earth

If you listen closely, you’ll find that the earth is full of sounds.  Some are things that you hear every day, some are truly remarkable and some sounds hail from origins completely unknown.  What follows here is a list of “sonic mysteries” for your pleasure – many of them include audio.

1. The Bloop

250px bloop Strange and mysterious sounds from the earth At various times during the summer of 1997, an ultra-low frequency sound that rose rapidly in frequency over about one minute was detected at 50 degrees S, 100 degrees W.   The sound was detected by the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with the Equatorial Pacific Ocean autonomous hydrophone array (which was U.S. Navy equipment originally designed to detect Soviet submarines), and was loud enough to be heard on multiple sensors, up to 5000km apart.  Scientists dubbed it the “Bloop” (not to be confused with the “Boing “.)

Although the sound matches the profile of a living animal, it is much louder than any known creature can produce.  Any creature that could produce such a sound would have to be many times larger than the largest whale.

You can hear a very short recording of the sound here .  The recording is short because it’s been sped up 16x to make it audible to you and I.

Some people link the Bloop to Cthulhu , a mythical creature from an H.P. Lovecraft story as the noise originated from an area near the mythical sunken city of R’lyeh from the same story.

The Bloop also makes an appearance in the game promoting the movie Cloverfield, and was also seen in the movie “The Loch”, coming from a giant eel.

A 2001 album by Dntel (”Life is full of possibilities “) uses the bloop as a repeating sample through the piece.

The actual origination of the sound is not known and remains a mystery to this day although it is suspected to be biological in origin.

2. The Hum

The hum is the name of a phenomenon that is generally given to mysterious low frequency humming or rumbling.  It is typically heard by many people at a time (but not others), and can come and go or it can be constant.  There are many famous Hums, most notably the Taos Hum and the Bristol Hum.

The Hum is usually difficult to record, and it’s often difficult to localize the source of the hum (perhaps due to the low frequency, as low frequency sounds are harder to localize).

Hums have been detected (or reported) all over the world, but most appear in Europe and South America.  The Hum is more often heard indoors, and some people hear it more faintly than others.  Here is a recording of the Auckland Hum.

The Taos Hum has been featured on the X-Files and Unsolved Mysteries.  The source of some Hums have been identified – for example, a pair of fans in a cooling tower at a DaimlerChrysler casting plant was emitting a 36 Hz tone that caused a Hum over the entire city of Kokomo, Indiana.  Other Hums remain a mystery.  Some possible explanations Include geological events, pulsed microwaves and electromagnetic waves from meteors.  Tinnitus might explain some cases as well.

A creditable scientific hypothesis from 2005 suggests the Hum is caused by the tensor tympani muscle (a muscle in the inner ear) trembling in the eardrums of individuals. on the eardrums of affected individuals by the tensor tympani muscle trembling.  There is a website by the “Interest Group for Research of the Hum Nuisance” (unfortunately in German) describing this theory.

3.The Hell Hole

(You can decide for yourself on this one…) More than forty years ago, researchers in the Soviet Union began an ambitious drilling project whose goal was to penetrate the Earth’s upper crust and sample the warm, mysterious area where the crust and mantle intermingle– the Mohorovičić discontinuity, or “Moho.”

hellhole Strange and mysterious sounds from the earthThis type of drilling was completely new and the technology didn’t exist to go that deep, so the Russians had to invent a completely new way of drilling to be able to do it. Unfortunately, the Russians never reached their goal, and many of the Earth’s secrets were left undiscovered, however The Kola Superdeep Borehole is still a scientifically useful site, and research there is ongoing.

When drilling stopped in 1994, the hole was over seven miles deep, making it by far the deepest hole ever drilled by humans. The last of the cores to be plucked from from the borehole was dated to be about 2.7 billion years old.  Although the Kona hole was the deepest hole ever drilled (until this one) , seven miles was still very short of the 20-80km required to penetrate  the earth’s crust.

Like all newfangled science stories, some Genesis freaks have decided that the intent of the project was not real scientific research as they were told – rather this simple experiment was actually an attempt to drill to hell… and that they were successful! The story has (and still does) made its rounds on Christian circles via tracts, preaching and radio broadcasts.

The story varies, but here are the basics:

1.  After going only a few miles down, the drill began to spin wildly.

2.  A ‘Doctor Azzakov’ is quoted as stating authoritatively that it has been shown that the earth is hollow.

3.  Immensely high temperatures were experienced, much higher than expected at that depth. Usually 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit or 1,100 degrees Celsius is quoted.

4.  Microphones were lowered into the hole (to ‘listen to the earth’s movement’). Human screams were heard—hordes of ‘tortured souls’.

5.  Many of the scientists have quit the project in fear and/or have become total nervous wrecks.

Of course, these “facts” are not quite true:

a) If the earth was largely hollow, it would clearly be evident from seismic studies, as well as from orbital/gravitational considerations, but this is not the case.

b) Far from being a ‘fiery inferno’, the temperature increased by one degree Celsius every 100 meters to 3,000 meters, then by 2.5 degrees every 100 meters thereafter. At 10,000 meters, it was only 180 degrees.

The story of course is based on a factual borehole, and creation geologists have had a field day with the shaky “facts” – using the story to prove that yes, hell exists and they’ve been right all along.

hell2 Strange and mysterious sounds from the earthHere’s the “quote” that has been making it’s way through evangelical circles:

“We lowered a microphone, designed to detect the sounds of plate movements down the shaft. But instead of plate movements we heard a human voice screaming in pain! At first we thought the sound was coming from our own equipment.”

“But when we made adjustments our worst suspicions were confirmed. The screams weren’t those of a single human, they were the screams of millions of humans!”

Oh, you wanted to HEAR the screams from hell?  But of course!  Listen to it here (mirror ) .

4. Mistpouffers

In some places in the world, people have reported long successions of enormously loud booming noises.  They are called different things in different areas of the world –  “Guns of the Seneca” (near Seneca Lake in New York), “Barisal guns ” (in Bangladesh), “uminari” (in Japan), “fog guns,” “lake guns,” and many other terms. These terms all describe a sound or sounds that resemble distant cannon fire, and are usually heard near large bodies of water.  Often times they are accompanied by a long rumble that is strong enough to shake plates and pictures.

There have been many proposed theories about where these sounds come from, however most are not very satisfying.  Since these sounds have been reported for centuries means that the most obvious explanation, artillery tests , are pretty much ruled out.  Earthquakes and volcanoes could produce these sounds and rumbles, however the sounds have not been directly connected to any seismic activity, which is fairly well measured.

Some have speculated that undersea activity (perhaps seismic) creates great bubbles of released gas which floats to the surface and creates huge “ocean farts”, however it is a stretch to think that these bubbles could produce a sound strong enough to create the distant-gunfire sound of Mistpouffers.  Meteorite impacts have also been bandied about as a possible explanation (see here for actual meteor sounds) as have tidal waves .

thor Strange and mysterious sounds from the earth It has also been speculated that these noises happen everywhere and that ambient noise from communities simply make them harder to hear.  Sound travels farther over water than over land, and so the sounds are more easily heard in remote, quiet areas close to bodies of water.

Of course the latest theory is rather boring – that the sounds are made by thunder or other explosions very far away, and the sounds simply travels a very, very long way because atmospheric and topographic conditions happen to be “just so”.  This would explain why no storms or other activity are present in the area and yet the sounds are still heard.

Some people still believe that the sounds are made from alien spacecraft, God, or Thor’s hammer banging on nails while trying to fix the roof over the heavens…. however there is another theory:

A Web page describing the many tourist attractions of the Cayuga Lake area mentions the “Guns of the Seneca.” it also says  “At the southern end, you’ll find the booming city of Ithaca…”  Well, that it. What people are hearing is obviously the sound of Ithaca booming.

5. Slow Down

slowdown Strange and mysterious sounds from the earth Slow down was recorded in the Pacific Ocean on May 19,1997.   It was recorded by the U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration located around 15 degrees S 115, degrees W.

It is called the Slow Down because the sound slowly decreases in frequency over the span of about 7 minutes.  It was detected using the same hydrophone array as the Bloop, and was loud enough to be detected on multiple sensors 2000km apart.

Here is a recording of the sound, sped up by 16 times.

Some people believe that this sound has been made by a giant squid or other large sea creature, however this theory doesn’t stand up to scientific reason, as squids likey  with tdo not have the capability of producing their beaks ese sounds.

The real source of the Slow Down sound remains completely unknown.  This signal and anything like it has not been heard before or since.

6. The WOW!

No discussion of mysterious sounds would be complete without this one, although it’s not a sound from earth – it’s from space.  You can also debate whether or not it’s actually technically a sound at all, but I’m presenting it here just because it’s interesting.

wow Strange and mysterious sounds from the earthOn August 15, 1977 a SETI scientist working at the Big Ear radio telescope of the Ohio State University noticed a very strong signal that lasted for 72 seconds.  The type of signal resembled signals that are non-terrestrial and non-solar system in origin.

Because the signal was so remarkable, The scientists circled the data on the computer printout and wrote the word “WOW!” beside it. Ever since then, it’s been called the “Wow!” signal.

Since the signal was discovered, scientists from all over have tried to locate it again, however it has never been seen since.

It has been theorized by some people that the signal may have come from extraterrestrial life, however others remain skeptical.

More information on the Wow can be found here by the person who discovered it.

Top 10: Modern Mysteries

Mysteries tap the imagination, fuel speculation and invite the attention of conspiracy theorists. While there are numerous ancient mysteries, they don’t excite us the same way these top 10 modern mysteries do; perhaps because we can relate to them easier if they’re closer to our own time. It is that ability to relate, to feel some connection,  that not only feeds the mystery, but — accurately or not — also seems to hint that a solution is within reach.

Thus, our criteria for our top 10 modern mysteries does not necessarily concern unsolved mysteries, but the enduring public fascination with the mystery itself as well as the implications of the possible answers (even if conventional wisdom suggests the mystery has more than adequately been solved).

Number 10

What happened to the Carroll A. Deering?

On January 31, 1921, the schooner Carroll A. Deering was spotted having run aground off the coast of North Carolina. When rescue ships finally reached her, they found nothing short of a ghost ship to rival the Mary Celeste, which suffered a similar fate 50 years earlier. The Deering’s entire crew was missing. Evidence in the galley suggested that food was being prepared for the following day, yet nothing was found of the crew; none of their personal effects and nothing relating to the schooner itself, such as the ship logs.

Speculation has pointed to the paranormal, notably to the fact that she was in the region that is today known as the Bermuda Triangle. Alternative theories have come forward as well, including one that is a sign of its times: that it was part of a communist plot spearheaded by Russia to seize U.S. ships.

Number 9

313j top 10 list1 Top 10: Modern MysteriesWho was D.B. Cooper?

How hard is it to dislike this guy? On November 21, 1971, in Portland, Oregon, a man calling himself Dan Cooper hijacked a Boeing 727 en route to Seattle by discreetly flashing a bomb to the stewardess and handing her a note. On landing, as the other passengers disembarked without any clue of Cooper’s intentions, authorities met his demands of $200,000 in cash and a set of parachutes. The 727 then took off following Cooper’s instructions and, shortly thereafter, he leapt from the plane into a stormy night.

Since then, few clues have surfaced concerning the crime. A boy found some of Cooper’s cash along a riverbank and, recently, the FBI thought his parachute had been found, but it turned out not to be the case. One man emerged as a suspect after he died, since on his death bed he told his wife, “I’m D.B. Cooper.”  She told the Discovery Channel’s Unsolved History that his confession, true or not, had ruined her life. If Cooper died in the jump, which the FBI contends, his remains won’t be found as Mount St. Helens covered the region with ash in 1980.

Number 8

Is the Riemann hypothesis true?

The Riemann hypothesis is not as well-known as other mysteries for at least one good reason: it has no catchy made-for-TV nickname. There’s so much to like about
E = mc2,” no wonder it swept the world. Riemann, on the other hand, sounds like this: “The real part of any non-trivial zero of the Riemann zeta function is ½.”

The curious thing about this hypothesis is that not only do most mathematicians believe it to be fact despite the lack of a comprehensive solution, a number of other complex mathematical problems have been solved on the basis that the Riemann is true. Right now, $1 million awaits the person who can prove the hypothesis. While a proof would be tantalizing, the more fascinating outcome would be if it were proven to be false.

Number 7

Who killed the Black Dahlia?

The discovery of the grossly mutilated body of 22-year-old Elizabeth Short in Los Angeles, on January 15, 1947, set off the biggest homicide investigation in the Southland, one that continues to baffle everyone who takes a look at the case even today. Short’s body had been drained of blood and cut in two, and her killer had morbidly given her the Glasgow smile: He cut her mouth from ear to ear.

The list of suspects is long, and any one of them can sound convincing; that is, if the argument is presented without a rebuttal, which is generally when they tend to fall apart. One notable suspect, Dr. George Hodel (now deceased like virtually all the suspects), has an unlikely man promoting his guilt: Hodel’s son and former LAPD homicide detective Steve Hodel. The case remains unsolved, and has inspired numerous books and movies, along with endless speculation. Physical evidence is scant, meaning this mystery is unlikely to ever be solved.

Number 6

Where is Jimmy Hoffa’s body?

On July 30, 1975, Jimmy Hoffa, the former head of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, had been out of prison for about four years. President Nixon had commuted his original 13-year sentence on attempted bribery to time-served, provided he stay away from unions until his prison time would have ended in 1980.

On that late July day, Hoffa, who was in the process of regaining union control in spite of Nixon’s restriction, got into a car in the Machus Red Fox restaurant parking lot in Bloomfield Township, Michigan. He hasn’t been seen since. The mystery has less to do with who killed him — the mob seems like the safest bet — than the location of his body. It has become something of a cultural landmark, a metaphor for the best hiding spot of all time.

Number 5

What causes the Taos Hum?

The Taos Hum is perhaps the best-known among a handful of very low-frequency “humming” sounds that people have reported hearing in various parts of the world, including the UK, North America and New Zealand. Questions persist about its origins, that maybe it’s paranormal or that it may be the sound of the universe expanding.

Curiously, the most sensitive acoustic devices — far more sensitive than the clumsy human ear — typically fail to pick up a note of humming. While local investigators have succeeded in tracing the source in some cases. For instance, the Kokomo Hum in Kokomo, Indiana, proved to be coming from a Chrysler plant. Could it be that it’s just all in our heads? After all, the regional “hums” and the symptoms reported by sufferers are so varied and often so contradictory that the source of the noise may be our imaginations.

Number 4

Who was the Zodiac Killer?

America did not invent the serial killer, but she has perfected him. And nowhere is this frightening perfection better brought to fruition than with the Zodiac Killer, the scourge of Bay Area detectives since the 1960s.

Remarkably, all confirmed Zodiac killings occurred in a 10-month span, between December 1968 and October 1969, yet his ability to outfox the police — as well as countless armchair detectives –has inspired movies, TV shows, novels, music, and practically his own shelf in the true-crime section at book stores. One of the ciphers he sent to police over three decades ago has still not been solved. Most recently, DNA evidence retrieved from licked envelopes sent by the Zodiac only heightened the mystery, when results ruled out a long-time favorite suspect in the case.

Number 3

What is pulling the universe apart?

Credible cosmologists and astrophysicists tell us that there is conclusive evidence that the universe is expanding — but they can not say why. The most prominent explanation for this theory is that there is a force at work that seems to be operating contrary to the force of gravity. Lacking a definitive explanation, they nonetheless gave it a tantalizing name: dark energy.

Dark energy, they believe, is the dominating force in our universe, representing a shocking two-thirds of its entire composition. In fact, they go a step further and suggest that another 30% of the universe is composed of dark matter, a concept as poorly understood as dark energy. Not quite getting this? It’s OK. Even those who proposed this don’t get it any better than you.

Number 2

What really happened at Area 51?

UFO buffs have gathered at the edges of Area 51 in Nevada for years, hoping to catch a glimpse of the alien spacecraft alleged to be docked at the sprawling, secretive government site. No one has done more to fuel speculation — as well as to remind people to consider individual credibility — than Bob Lazar.

As Bob told it in 1989, the U.S. government had nine UFO spacecraft at Area 51, and they needed some brilliant physicists to come in and “reverse engineer” them (read: figure out how they work). Lazar, a self-proclaimed physicist who by day ran a one-hour photo lab, got the nod and a top-level security clearance. Unfortunately, he had to show off the UFO to friends and got caught.

While it is well-known that the government developed top secret military technology there — including the likes of the F-117 Stealth Fighter and the B-2 Spirit Stealth Bomber — it is supremely unlikely that Area 51 ever held a UFO. Nonetheless, a cottage industry was born around Area 51, much of it thanks to conspiracy theorists with no concern for the government’s official line on the incident.

Number 1

Was the JFK assassination a conspiracy?

The assassination of President Kennedy lands at No. 1 not because it is one of the great unsolved mysteries of our time, but because of its unmatched cultural impact. For many people — who were alive at the time and who were not born yet — President Kennedy represented something truly larger than life. Consequently it was, and still remains, nearly impossible for them to imagine a giant like JFK being killed by a loser with a scope and a view.

Among the many testaments to this is the remarkably desperate diligence of conspiracy theorists, who can ignore 2,999 pages of declassified CIA documents and focus on a single line from page 3,000, and build a complicated theory of a mob hit or a Cuban connection.
The inability to accept the theory of a lone gunman, and the ability to believe in any other scenario despite the lack of even a trace of conclusive evidence, is the greater mystery here because it hints at something mysterious, remarkably fragile and even endearing about the human psyche.

What Would Abraham Lincoln Do About the Economy?

abraham lincoln What Would Abraham Lincoln Do About the Economy?Abraham Lincoln’s marble temple in Washington is as familiar as the back of a penny. But the figure enthroned inside will always be above and apart, a demigod — martyr, prophet, scourge and healer rolled into one. That he was killed on Good Friday with hosannas of triumph still echoing in his ears added a religious overtone to the grief of his countrymen and, from the hour of his death, guaranteed that Lincoln could never again fit into the frame of an ordinary man.

But he was a man, in ways as familiar as the guy next door. He liked sports, dirty jokes and being the alpha male. He flirted with pretty women and suffered occasional deafness when his wife was talking. He put his feet on the furniture, encouraged his sons to roughhouse and break things, suffered from bad digestion. And he spent a lot of his life thinking about money. Not that he was greedy — quite the opposite — but he had a poor boy’s understanding of the fact that money is a powerful tool, the lever that makes ambition possible. “The penniless beginner in the world,” he once explained, “labors for wages awhile, saves a surplus with which to buy tools or land, for himself; then labors on his own account another while, and at length hires another new beginner to help him.” This steady, gradual advance, Lincoln insisted, is “the prosperous system, which opens the way for all — gives hope to all, and energy, and progress, and improvement of condition to all.” We know it as the American Dream, and it certainly worked for him. Beginning with nothing, Lincoln managed to educate himself, raise a family in comfort and subsidize his history-shaping political campaigns — all thanks to that useful instrument, money.

This mundane fact may seem so obvious that it isn’t worth mentioning in the middle of a flood of Lincoln hoopla. February marks the bicentennial of Lincoln’s birth. Bookstore shelves are sagging under the weight of new Lincoln tomes. Museums, galleries and lecture halls across the country and around the world have scheduled Lincoln programs. New pennies are being minted, old controversies revisited. And this already keen interest has been further stoked by what Lincoln Bicentennial Commission executive director Eileen Mackevich calls an “Obama wind.” The new President, another slender fellow from Illinois, has been busy reading about Lincoln, quoting Lincoln, evoking Lincoln. The Lincoln Memorial was among Barack Obama’s first stops in Washington, and when Obama was sworn in last month it was, for many, the culmination of a long march that began with Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation.

Inevitably, the main focus of all this attention is Lincoln’s views on race and equality, and his leadership during the cataclysmic Civil War. Yet given the fix we’re in, Lincoln’s economic ideas deserve some attention too. Long before he gave his first speeches about Union or slavery, Lincoln was a crusader on questions of economic development and banking. He cut his political teeth on conditions painfully topical for us today: an economic crash that left the young legislator struggling to shore up a failing bank while arguing for government spending on public works.

Lincoln would surely be intrigued to see the son of an African man living with his wife, the descendant of slaves, in his old digs at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. But what might fascinate him even more, were he to materialize for his bicentennial, is the extent to which the American economy has fulfilled and exceeded his urgent vision of an entrepreneurial, innovative marketplace geared to upward mobility. The man who once said “I know of nothing so pleasant to the mind, as the discovery of anything which is at once new and valuable” would have a swell time visiting Apple headquarters or touring a genetic-engineering lab. Among the mansions and pretensions of our millionaires and billionaires, he would shrug and say (as he said in 1860), “I don’t believe in a law to prevent a man from getting rich; it would do more harm than good. [But] while we do not propose any war upon capital, we do wish to allow the humblest man an equal chance to get rich with everybody else.”

VIA

5 things you didn’t know about police dogs

When trails run cold or drugs can’t be detected by the human eye, police often turn to the noses of their four-legged partners. In these days of DNA testing and high-tech communication, sometimes one of the best tools in law enforcement is man’s best friend

g11e19067846ea92a4ab9c3kp7 5 things you didnt know about police dogs

Inv. Gregory Shaffer, supervisor of the Ontario County Sheriff’s Office K-9 Unit, offered five things the general public might not know about police dogs. The sheriff’s office K-9 Unit was launched in May 1984 with two dogs, Samson and Arek; it now has three full-time working dogs — Frenkie, Scooter and Asta. A fourth dog, Penny, passed away in 2007 and was replaced by another bloodhound, Truman.

1) Police dogs are not meant to be pets: Although trained police dogs live with their designated handlers, they are not like normal house pets, Shaffer said.
“Their disposition is different, their drive is different,” he said. “Police dogs have extremely high drives and are not always the most pleasant dogs to be around.” The best police dogs, Shaffer said, are “very aggressive, very territorial.”

2) Bloodline and breed matter: Bloodhounds, like Penny, are tracking specialists that use their noses to find lost or missing people. Deputy John Peck said a bloodhound once sniffed out vandals that used heavy machinery to cause thousands of dollars in damage to the Canandaigua Tops by following a scent from a discarded beer can. Labradors, like Shaffer’s “partner” Scooter, are good at finding narcotics and accelerants but are weaker at patrol work, like taking down hostile suspects. German shepherds, meanwhile, are well-rounded dogs that can sniff out contraband and fiercely defend their handlers, Shaffer said.

3) Training is paramount and ongoing: Dogs go through two rounds of training at the Onondaga County Sheriff’s Office. There, they learn the basics of bite-work and handler protection. Dogs are also trained to hone in on the scents of 10 different accelerants and four types of drugs (marijuana, cocaine, heroin and amphetamines).

g181190ca6af36dbd207268ps1 5 things you didnt know about police dogs4) Police dogs need to play: It’s an essential part of their training. They’re trained to react to scents in different ways. When they smell drugs, most dogs scratch, dig and try to bite at the item bearing the scent. Bomb-detection dogs are trained to sit, lie down or stare in the direction of whatever they smell. “If they smell an odor, they react in the way they were trained,” Shaffer said. Handlers tdaj gahen reward the animal by letting them play with a toy that has the scent they are trained to detect. “The dogs are trying to play,” Shaffer said. “They want to find their toy.”

5) Retirement can be tough: Like their human partners, years of hard work can take a toll on police dogs, forcing them to retire. Retirement ages and reasons vary for each dog, Shaffer said. His dog, Scooter, will soon retire after about eight years of duty because of a seizure disorder, he said. Judgie, the unit’s last labrador, was on the job for 13 years and was instrumental in a large drug bust just a few weeks before he died of a stroke. When the time comes to hang up their badge, most dogs go to live with their handlers. While they can be fierce when on duty, most dogs mellow with age. “I know a lot of guys who had dogs that were terrors on the street, but when they took them home, they became great house pets,” he said.

America’s Craziest Laws

Alabama
# Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.
# Incestuous marriages are legal.
# It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.
# It is illegal to stab yourself to gain someone’s pity.
# It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
# Masks may not be worn in public
# Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.
# Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.
# You cannot chain your alligator to a fire hydrant.
# You may not drive barefooted.
# You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.

Alaska
# In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone’s ear while they are moose hunting.
# Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time.
# While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.

Arizona
# A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
# Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
# It is illegal to take naked photographs before noon on Sunday.
# It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.
# Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.
# There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus.
# You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
# Glendale: Cars may not be driven in reverse.
# Maricopa County: No more than six girls may live in any house.
# Mesa: It is illegal to smoke cigarettes within 15 feet of a public place unless you have a Class 12 liqueur license.
# Mohave County: A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.
# Nogales: An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
# Tucson: Women may not wear pants.

Arkansas
# A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise.
# Fayetteville: It is illegal to kill “any living creature”.
# It is illegal to buy or sell blue lightbulbs.
# It’s illegal to mispronounce the name of the state of Arkansas.
# Little Rock: Dogs may not bark after 6 PM.; Flirtation between men and women on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term; It is unlawful to walk one’s cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday; No person shall sound the horn on a vehicle at any place where cold drinks or sandwiches are served after 9:00 P.M. -Little Rock City Code Sec. 18-54
# The Arkansas legislature passed a law that states that the Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock.

California
# A city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits.
# Alhambra: You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.
# Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
# A regulation in San Francisco makes it unlawful to use used underwear to wipe off cars in a car wash.
# Baldwin Park: Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
# Bathhouses are against the law.
# Blythe: You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
# Burlingame: It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds; Carmel Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor); Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
# Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.
# Hollywood: It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
# In Los Angeles courts it is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
# In California it is illegal to have caller ID
# In California it’s against regulations to let phones ring more than nine times in state offices.
# In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can’t be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife’s consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated.
# In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
# In Riverside, California, kissing on the lips, unless both parties wipe their lips with carbonized rose water, is against the local health ordinance. (Someone needed to be kissed!)
# In San Francisco it’s illegal to play poker in public or gamble in a barricaded room.
# In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.
# It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
# It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.
# It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub
# It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.
# Lodi: It is illegal to own or sell “Silly String”.
# Lompoc: It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.
# Long Beach: Cars are the only item allowed in a garage; It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
# Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
# No alcohol beverages can be displayed within five feet of a cash register of any store in California that sells both alcohol and motor fuel.
# No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
# Prunedale: Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.
# Riverside: One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o’clock.
# San Diego: It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar; The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.
# San Francisco bans any “mechanical device that reproduces obscene language.”
# San Jose: It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs. -Ord. 7.08.595
# Santa Monica: You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.
# Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
# The city of San Francisco holds a copyright on the name “San Francisco.” It is illegal to manufacture any item with the name without first getting permission from the city. Since the Supreme Court upheld the copyright, San Francisco has had an annual $300 million surplus every year.

Colorado
# Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.
# Colorado Springs: It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays.
# Crippe Creek: It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.
# Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park; It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor; It is illegal to mistreat rats; You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
# It is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver.
# Durango: It is illegal to go in public dressed in clothes “unbecoming” on one’s sex.
# In Colorado it’s now legal to remove the furniture tags that say, “Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law.”
# In Denver, Colorado it is illegal for Barber’s to give massages to nude customers unless it is for instructional purposes.
# Logan County: It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.
# It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.2% alcohol.
# It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

Connecticut
# A local ordinance in Atwoodville, Connecticut prohibits people from playing Scrabble while waiting for a politician to speak.
# A pickle is not officially a pickle unless it bounces
# Balloons with advertising on them are illegal in Hartford, Conn.
# Bloomfield, Conn: It’s against the law to eat in your car.
# Devon: It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
# Guilford: Only white Christmas lights are allowed for display.
# Hartford: You aren’t allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands
# In colonial times, Hartford, Conn., had an ordinance that allowed any resident to rent the town chain for 2 pence.
# In Connecticut any dogs with tattoos must be reported to the police.
# In Connecticut it is illegal to pirouette while crossing the street.
# In Hartford, Conn., it’s illegal to plant a tree in the street.
# In Hartford, Connecticut, it is illegal to kiss your wife on Sunday.
# In Simsbury, Conn., it’s illegal for a politician to campaign at the town dump.
# It is illegal to discharge a firearm from a public highway.
# It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.
# New Britain: It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.
# No one may use a white cane, unless they are blind.
# Waterbury: It is illegal for any beautician to hum, whistle, or sing while working on a customer.
# You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
# You cannot buy any alcohol after 8pm or on Sundays.
# You may not educate dogs.

Delaware
# Delaware prohibits horse racing of any kind on Good Friday and Easter Sunday.
# In Delaware it is illegal to get married on a dare.
# In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.
# It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.

D.C.
# A D.C. federal judge has ruled that begging is a form of free speech protected by the Constitution. That means that mugging is free speech too, only more persuasive.
# In Washington D.C. it is illegal to post a notice in public which calls another person a ‘coward’ for refusing to accept a challenge to duel.
# It is unlawful for small boys to throw stones, at any time, at any place in the District of Columbia.
# The only acceptable sexual position in Washington D.C. is the missionary position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal.
# The U.S. government says it’s a crime to give false weather reports.

#
Florida
# Florida prohibits topless walking or running within a 150 foot zone between the beach and the street.
# Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
# Daytona Beach: The molestation of trash cans is banned; While intoxicated, being under influence of narcotics is prohibited; It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired;
# Florida deals with its prostitution problem by giving prostitutes spending money, a five-year banishment, and a bus ticket out of town.
# Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
# Hialeah: Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
# If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
# Failure to tell your neighbor his house is on fire is illegal.
# It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
# In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
# In Saratoga, Florida it is illegal to sing while wearing a bathing suit.
# It is considered an offense to shower naked.
# It is illegal to fart in a public place after 6:00pm on a Thursday.
# Key West: Chickens are considered a ‘protected species’.
# Oral sex is illegal.
# You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.
# Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
# Pensacola: Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person; It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel; A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
# Pinecrest: In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained.
# Sanford Stage: Nudity is banned, with the exception of “bona fide” theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.
# Sarasota: If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00; You may not catch crabs.
# Tampa Bay: It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.
# Under a 1959 ordinance, stubborn children were considered vagrants in Jupiter Inlet Colony, Fla.
# When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
# Women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer. The salon owner can also be fined for this horrible crime.

Georgia
# Acworth: All citizens must own a rake.
# A Kennesaw, Ga. law makes it illegal for every homeowner not to own a gun, unless you are a convicted felon, conscientious objector or disabled.
# Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
# Atlanta: Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp; One man may not be on another man’s back.
# Columbus: Can’t cut off a chicken’s head on Sunday; It is illegal to carry a chicken by it’s feet down Broadway on Sunday.
# Gainesville: Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
# In Atlanta, Georgia, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
# In Columbus, Georgia it is illegal to sit on one’s porch in an indecent position.
# In Georgia, movie houses that want to show films on Sunday must reserve one showing a month for religious material.
# It is illegal in Georgia to use profanity in the presence of a corpse.
# In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
# It is illegal to change the clothes on a storefront mannequin unless the shades are down.
# It is illegal to say “Oh, Boy” in Jonesboro.
# It is illegal to take a bath of orange peel.
# Kennesaw: Every head of household must possess a firearm of some kind.
# Marietta: Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
# Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
# Signs are required to be written in English.
# St. Mary’s: No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.
# Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.

Hawaii
# Honolulu: Within the limits of any public park, it is unlawful to annoy any bird.
# In Hawaii it is illegal to get a tattoo behind your ear or on your eyelid unless in the presence of a registered physician.
# Coins are not allowed to be placed in one’s ears.
# It used to be the law in Hawaii that children had to obey all “lawful and moral” commands of their parents.
# It’s illegal for a shooting gallery to offer liquor as a prize. The shooter might want to come back after drinking the prize and try again.
# You will be fined if you do not own a boat.

Idaho
# It is illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
# If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
# Idaho Falls: If you’re 88 years of age or older, it’s illegal for you to ride your motorcycle.
# Idaho and other states allow members of the Native American church to use the hallucinogenic plant peyote in religious services.
# Walking along the street with a red-tipped cane is strictly prohibited.
# Non-married couples in Idaho who engage in sexual intercourse can be jailed for up to six months
# Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
# You may not fish on a camel’s back.

Illinois
# “Dwarf-tossing,” the strange practice of hurling dwarfs in padded suits, is outlawed in the bars of Springfield, Ill., because it’s dangerous and exploitative. The practice is apparently allowed elsewhere in town, with a special permit.
# A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.
# It is illegal to speak English. The officially recognized language is “American”.
# Champaign: One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth.
# Chicago: Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire; It is illegal to give a dog whiskey; Kites may not be flown within the city limits; Spitting is forbidden
# Cicero: Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
# Crete: It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog; Cars may not be driven through the town.
# Des Plaines: Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.
# Eureka: A man with a moustache may not kiss a woman.
# Evanston: Bowling is forbidden; It is illegal to go trick-or-treating on Halloween; It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
# Fairfield: It is unlawful for “Negroes” to be within county boundaries from sundown to sunrise.
# Freeport: It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window.
# Galesburg: There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
# Homer: It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
# If the Rushville, Ill., city council doesn’t have a quorum, those sent can have the cops go out and arrest absent members and bring them to the meeting.
# In Illinois it is illegal for barbers to use their fingers to apply shaving cream to a customer’s face.
# In Illinois, it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets.
# In Chicago it is also illegal to take a French poodle to the opera, and for women over 200 pounds (90 kilos) to ride horses in shorts.
# In Chicago, it is illegal to fish in pajamas.
# In Chicago, people who are diseased, maimed, mutilated, or “otherwise an unsightly or disgusting object” are banned from going out in public.
# In Oblong, it’s punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.
# In Zion, it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animals kept as pets.
# It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of Urbana, Illinois.
# It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
# It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
# It’s not clear what this has done to the bar business, but a law in Chicago, makes it illegal to serve liquor to the feeble-minded.
# Kenilworth: A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow; Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
# Kirkland: Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kirkland’s streets.
# Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
# Moline: Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited; There is a ban on unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.
# Morton Grove: You may not own a handgun
# Normal: It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
# Orland Park: No pool tables are allowed in a public establishment, because it supports gambling.
# Ottawa: Spitting on the sidewalk is a criminal offense.
# Park Ridge: Trucks may only park inside closed garages.
# Peoria: Basketball hoops may not be installed on a driveway.
# Pullman: It is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb; It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe’s neck; It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
# The English language is not to be spoken.
# Take some elocution lessons if you’re going to Joliet, Ill., where it’s against the law to mispronounce the city’s name. Offenders can be fined up to $500.
# The people in Manteno, Ill., do not want used facial tissue, period. Hence, you cannot “throw, drop or place” a used hankie “upon any public way or public place or upon the floor of any convenience or upon the floor of any theater, hall or assembly or public building or upon the surface or any lot or parcel of ground or on the roof on any building or in any light or air shaft, court or areaway.”
# You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
# You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of “eavesdropping” on your own conversation. -720 ILCS 5/14-2.

Indiana
# “Spiteful Gossip” and “talking behind a person’s back” are illegal.
# A three dollar fine per pack will be imposed on anyone playing cards in Indiana under the Act for the Prevention of Gaming.
# All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.
# Anyone 14 or older who profanely curses, damns or swears by the name of God, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, shall be fined one to three dollars for each offense, with a maximum fine of ten dollars per day.
# Auburn: It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area. For these offenses, there is a fine of no more than $5 or the impounding of one’s bicycle for a period not to exceed 30 days.
# Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
# Beech Grove: It is forbidden to eat watermelon in the park.
# Check forgery can be punished with public flogging up to 100 stripes.
# Citizens are not allowed to attend a cinema or theatre nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.
# Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest.
# Drinks on the house are illegal.
# Elkhart: It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid’s ears.
# Evansville: While driving on Main Street you may not have your lights on.
# Fort Wayne: You may not sell or play on a radio broadcast, the record “It’s In the Book”.
# Grocery stores may not sell any type of cold liquor.
# Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
# If any person has a puppet show, wire dancing or tumbling act in the state of Indiana and receives money for it, they will be fined $3 under the Act to Prevent Certain Immoral Practices.
# In Indiana it is illegal to sell laughing gas with the intent to induce laughter.
# In South Bend, Indiana, it is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
# It is against the law to pass a horse on the street.
# Men are prohibited from standing in a bar.
# Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.
# No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
# One man may not back into a parking spot because it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate.
# Oral sex is illegal.
# Pedestrians crossing the highway at night are prohibited from wearing tail lights.
# Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.
# State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post.
# Taxpayers of Bainbridge, Ind., used to have to swear a solemn oath that the values they placed on their taxable property were the fair market values.
# Terre Haute: No one may spit on the sidewalk.
# The value of Pi is 4, and not 3.1415
# You are not allowed to carry a cocktail from the bar to a table; the waiter or waitress has to do it.
# You are required to pour your drink into a glass.
# You can get out of paying for a dependent’s medical care by praying for him/her.

Iowa
# A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
# An owner or employee of an establishment in Iowa that sells alcohol can’t legally consume a drink there after closing for business.
# Don’t plan on running a “tab” in Iowa; it’s illegal.
# Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.
# If a law enforcement officer is having a drink in a bar in Iowa and an employee pours water down the drain, the water is legally considered an alcohol beverage intended for unlawful purposes.
# In Dubuque any hotel in the city limits must have a water bucket and a hitching post in front of the building.
# In Fort Madison the fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire.
# Indianola: The “Ice Cream Man” and his truck are banned.
# It is illegal to hunt from an aircraft.
# It is illegal to accept a gratuity or tip in Iowa.
# Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
# One-armed piano players must perform for free.
# Ottumwa: Within the city limits, a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.
# Riverboat gamblers in Iowa have a $5 maximum bet.
# The Iowa Legislature once passed a resolution ordering the state cafeteria to start serving cornbread.
# Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn’t allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you — or holding you in his arms.
# You may shoot Native Americans if there are more than five of them on your property at any one time.

Kansas
# If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
# In Kansas City, KS, saying the name “George Washington” without adding the phrase “blessed be his name,” can land you with a fine of up to fifty cents.
# In Natoma, Kansas, it’s illegal to throw knives at men wearing striped suites.
# In Topeka, Kansas, servers are forbidden to serve wine in teacups.
# In Wichita, at the intersection of Douglas and Broadway, all motorists are required to stop at the intersection, exit their vehicles, and fire three shotgun rounds, before continuing on their way.
# It is illegal to catch bullfrogs in a tomato patch.
# It is illegal to hunt whales.
# It is illegal to put ice cream on cherry pie in Kansas.
# Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to wear tail lights.
# Lawrence: All cars entering the city limits must first sound their horn to warn the horses of their arrival. No one may wear a bee in their hat.
# Minors in Kansas City, Missouri, are not allowed to purchase cap pistols; they may buy shotguns freely, however.
# No one may catch fish with his bare hands in Kansas.
# Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
# Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats.
# Russell: Musical car horns are banned
# Salina: It is against the law to leave your car running unattended.
# The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
# Topeka: The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.
# Wichita: Before proceeding through the intersection of Douglas and Broadway, a motorist is required to get out of their vehicle and fire three shot gun rounds into the air. Any person caught using or carrying bean snappers or the like shall upon conviction, be fined. -City ordinance 349 of Wichita, Kansas.

Kentucky
# A person can be sent to jail for five years for merely sending a bottle of beer, wine or spirits as a gift to a friend in Kentucky.
# An ordinance in Murray, Ky., says the superintendent of sanitation “shall determine whether a person is small, medium or large.” Why the superintendent should make this determination is left unsaid.
# A Kentucky statute says: “No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club.” Later, an amendment proposed: “The provisions of this statute shall not apply to any female weighing less than sixty pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds; nor shall it apply to female horses.”
# All nude people in your house must be registered in Kentucky.
# An excerpt from brilliant Kentucky state legislation. “No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club”. The following important ammendment however is to be considered here: “The provisions of this statuate shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds,
# Any person who appears on any highway, or upon the street of any city that has no police protection, when clothed only in ordinary bathing garb, shall be fined no less than five dollars nor more than twenty-five dollars.” – KRS 436.140
# Any person who displays, handles or uses any kind of reptile in connection with any religious service or gathering shall be fined not less than fifty dollars ($50) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100). -KRS 437.060 (Passed 1942, from Ky. Stat. sec. 1267a-1.).
# By law, anyone who has been drinking is “sober” until he or she “cannot hold onto the ground”.
# Each year, the mayor of Danville, Ky., must appoint “three intelligent housekeepers” to the Board of Tax Supervisors.
# Frankfort, Kentucky, makes it against the law to shoot off a policeman’s tie.
# In Danville, Ky., it’s illegal to throw slops or soapsuds in the street.
# In Kentucky, according to an old law, it’s illegal to use any kind of reptile in a religious service. It’s not certain if the law would withstand First Amendment scrutiny today.
# In Kentucky every citizen of is required to take a shower once a year.
# In Kentucky you need a license to walk around nude on your property.
# In Lexington, Kentucky, it’s illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your pocket.
# It is illegal in Kentucky to marry the same man more than 3 times.
# It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.
# It is illegal to shoot game out of the window of a moving vehicle, with the exception of a whale
# It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
# It’s illegal to fish in the Ohio River in Kentucky without an Indiana Fishing License.
# Lexington: It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket. By law, anyone who has been drinking is “sober” until he or she “cannot hold onto the ground.”
# No person owning or controlling a billiard or pool table shall permit, for compensation or reward, any minor under eighteen (18) years of age to play any game on the table, unless such minor shall have first displayed an identification card containing his name, age, photograph, and the signature of his parents or guardian. The minor shall keep such identification card on his person, and it shall be subject to inspection at any time by any peace officer. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall keep and maintain a registration book in which each minor shall sign. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall supply a blank identification card to each parent or guardian who makes request for same. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than ten ($10) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100) for each offense. -KRS 436.320 (Passed 1893; Amended in 1954, Ky. Acts ch. 232, sec. 1)
# No person shall sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange, display or possess living baby chicks, ducklings, or other fowl or rabbits which have been dyed or colored; nor dye or color any baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits; nor sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange or to give away baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits, under two months of age in any quantity less than six, except that any rabbit weighing three pounds or more may be sold at an age of six weeks. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than $100 nor more than $500. -KRS 436.600 (Passed 1966 Ky. Acts ch. 215, sec. 5.)
# Owensboro: A woman may not buy a hat without her husband’s permission. One may not receive anal sex. All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates of health, stating that the apiary from which the bees came was free from contagious or infectious disease. -KRS 252.130 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1948)

Louisiana
# An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
# Biting someone with your natural teeth is “simple assault”, while biting someone with your false teeth is “aggravated assault”.
# Communism has been against the law in Haines City, La., since 1950.
# If you’ve ever been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans, you’ll see the kings and queens on the various floats throwing plastic money, medallions and jewels to the crowd, but not food. It’s against the law to throw food from a float in the Mardi Gras festivities.
# It is against state law to steal even a single crawfish.
# It is illegal to gargle in public places.
# It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
# It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it.
# It is illegal in Lafayette, Louisiana to play a musical instrument for the purpose of attracting attention, without a license.
# It’s legal to walk down the street with a drink in New Orleans, even to drive with a drink. But if you fall over and block the sidewalk, you’ve just broken the law.
# Louisiana law prohibits couples who are shopping for a new bed from putting it to the “ultimate test”– in other words, from trying it out by making love on it, or even simulating this activity.
# Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
# New Orleans: You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
# Rituals that involve the ingestion of blood, urine, or fecal matter are not allowed.
# Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
# Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
# You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.

Maine
# After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
# In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
# It’s illegal to clean salmon along Maine’s upper Kennebec River. Enforcement of this law has been made easier for many years by the fact that, because of a dam, there are no salmon on the upper Kennebec River.
# In Maine, it is illegal to sell a car on Sunday unless it comes equipped with plumbing.
# In Maine it’s illegal to catch lobsters with your bare hands.
# In Portland shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
# In Waterville, Maine, it is illegal to blow one’s nose in public.
# It’s unlawful to tickle a woman’s chin with a feather duster in Portland.
# Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
# Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.
# You may not step out of a plane in flight.

Maryland
# Baltimore City: Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited. You may not curse inside the city limits.
# Baltimore: It’s illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies. It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898) -Park Rule 6 It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
# Baltimore has regulations governing the disposal of hog’s heads, pet droppings and oyster shells.
# Columbia: You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish. Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
# Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
# Gypsies should steer clear of Caroline County, Md., where it’s a $100 fine or six months in the can for “forecasting or pretending to foretell the future.”
# In Baltimore it’s illegal to block the sidewalk with a box. But the offense only carries a $1 fine. Another law makes it illegal to throw bale of hay (or of anything else) out a second-story window. That gets you a $20 fine. In Baltimore it’s illegal to play professional croquet before 2 p.m. Sunday. The law also applies to professional quoits.
# In Baltimore it is illegal to mistreat oysters.
# In Baltimore, it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks no matter how dirty they get.
# In Baltimore, Maryland, it is not legal to take a lion to the movies.
# In Halethrope, Maryland kisses longer than one second are illegal.
# In Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband’s pockets while he is sleeping.
# In Maryland, men may not buy drinks for female bartenders.
# In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only “in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.”
# In Maryland, the legislature once proposed a board of parachute examiners to be made up of five licensed parachute instructors who would test and license all other parachute instructors. The plan had been abandoned when it was learned there were only three licensed parachute instructors in the state.
# In the entire state of Maryland, it is illegal to give or recieve oral sex.
# It is a violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine.
# It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.
# Maryland now requires that alcohol beverage writers be certified as experts by an agency of the state before they can receive product samples, which it limits to three bottles per brand.
# Ocean City: A law from the early 1900’s prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited
# Thistles may not grow in one’s yard.
# You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish.
# You cannot swear while inside the city limits of Baltimore.
# You cannot throw a bail of hay out of a second story window in Annapolis.
# You may not curse inside the city limits.

Massachusetts
# A Boston mayor who disliked dancing and liked to retire early once banned midnight dancing in the Hub City.
# A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
# Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
# Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
# All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.
# An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
# At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
# Boston: It is illegal to play the fiddle. Two people may not kiss in front of a church. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city. No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except o Sundays. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common. No one may take a bath without a prescription. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
# Both Massachusetts and New Hampshire had old laws that penalized gamblers who lost money. You’d get fined in Massachusetts if you had any money left.
# Bullets may not be used as currency.
# Burlington: You may not walk around with a “drink”.
# Cambridge: It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
# Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
# Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
# Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
# Hingham: You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
# Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
# Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
# Holyoke, Massachusetts, makes it unlawful to water your lawn when it is raining.
# In a law that predates returnable bottles and cans, it’s illegal in Boston to rummage through rubbish containers.
# In 1659 the state of Massachusetts outlawed Christmas.
# In Boston it’s illegal to post an advertisement on a public urinal. It’s also against the law to hang a vending machine on a utility pole.
# In Boston, it’s illegal to cut firewood in the street, or shoot a bow and arrow in the street.
# In Boston it’s against the law to keep manure in a building unless the building is being used as a stable. If it is, you can keep up to two cords of manure. If you’re overstocked, you need a permit to move the stuff. And you can’t leave it in the street.
# In Boston, Massachusetts it is illegal to take a bath unless instructed to do so by a physician.
# In Massachusetts, it is unlawful to deliver diapers on Sunday, regardless of emergencies.
# In Massachusetts you must have a license to wear a goatee.
# In Massachusetts, if you get caught eating peanuts in church , you can be jailed for up to one year.
# In Provincetown, Mass., it’s illegal to sell suntan oil until after noon on Sunday.
# In Salem, Massachesetts sleeping in the nude in a rented room is forbidden, even for married couples.
# It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
# It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
# It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder.
# It is illegal to reproach Jesus Christ or the holy ghost.
# It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
# It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
# It’s illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building.
# It’s illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road.
# It’s illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
# It’s illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color.
# It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.
# Longmeadow: It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
# Marlboro: It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun. Silly string is illegal in the city limits. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
# Massachusetts law declares that peanuts may not be eaten in court.
# Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
# Milford: Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
# Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
# Newton: All families must be given a hog from the town’s mayor.
# No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
# North Andover: An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
# Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
# Public boxing matches are outlawed.
# Quakers and witches are banned.
# Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
# Southbridge, Massachusetts, makes it illegal to read books or newspapers after 8 p.m. in the streets.
# Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
# Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
# There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs tied during the month of April.
# Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
# Under an old law in Marblehead, Mass., it was illegal to cross the street on Sunday, unless absolutely necessary.
# Woburn: In bars, it is illegal to “walk around” with a beer in your hand.
# You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish.
# You may not curse inside the city limits.
# You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour.

Michigan
# A Michigan law states that a wife’s hair legally belongs to her husband.
# A woman isn’t allowed to cut her own hair without her husband’s permission.
# Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
# In Clawson, Mich., there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
# In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple’s own property.
# In Detroit, Michigan it is illegal to sleep in a bathtub.
# In Rochester, Michigan, anyone bathing in public must have his or her bathing suit inspected by a police officer.
# It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
# It is illegal to loiter in the city morgue in Detroit.
# It’s illegal in Michigan for a person under the age of 21 to give a gift of alcohol beverage to anyone, even to a person of legal age.
# Permitting diners to take home an unfinished bottle of alcohol beverage, rather than consuming it all before leaving to prevent “waste,” encourages moderation and discourages intoxication. However, this is prohibited in Michigan.
# Smoking while in bed is illegal.
# The use of the names of dead presidents to sell alcohol in Michigan is prohibited.
# Under an 1889 law, the health officer of East Jordan, Mich., could send any nonresident with an infectious disease back to where he came from, as long as the person could travel. If not, the officer could rent a house for use as a pest house.
# You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.

Minnesota
# A Blue Earth, Minnesota, law declares that no child under the age of twelve may talk over the telephone unless monitored by a parent.
# A Minnesota tax form is quite thorough. Some would say too thorough. It even asks for your date of death.
# A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.
# A woman isn’t allowed to cut her own hair without her husband’s permission.
# All bathtubs must have feet.
# All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.
# Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
# Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.
# Clawson: There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
# Every man in Brainerd, Minnesota is required by law to grow a beard.
# Grand Haven: No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense.
# Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
# Harper Woods: It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets.
# Hibbing: It shall be the duty of any policeman or any other officer to enforce the provisions of this Section, and if any cat is found running at large, or which is found in any street, alley or public place, it shall be the duty of any policeman or other officer of the city to kill such cat.
# In Duluth, Minnesota it is illegal to allow animals to sleep in a bakery.
# In Minnesota, it’s illegal to tease skunks. (As if being sprayed weren’t enough of a deterrent.)
# It is illegal to sleep naked.
# It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
# It used to be legal in Minnesota to sell rolled candy on Sunday, and illegal to sell flat candy. The wafer people have gotten this one repealed.
# Minneapolis: Red cars can not drive down Lake Street
# Minnesota has repealed its so-called “Twinkie” law, under which a Minneapolis City Council candidate was indicted for dispensing $34 worth of Twinkies, Ho-Hos, cookies, Kool-Aid and coffee to some senior citizens.
# Minnesotans are forbade from teasing skunks.
# No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
# Oral sex is prohibited.
# Public intoxication is a crime in Pennsylvania but specifically not a crime in Minnesota.
# Rochester: All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police. Smoking while in bed is illegal.
# St. Cloud: Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
# There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat’s head brought into a town office.
# Virginia: You’re not allowed to park your elephant on Main Street.
# Wayland: Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day.
# You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan. Kalamazoo: It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend.

Mississippi
# Adultery or Fornication (living together while not married or having sex with someone that is not your spouse) results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison.
# Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.
# Columbus: The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.
# Horses are not to be housed within 50 feet of any road.
# In Brandon, Mississipi it is illegal to attempt to stop someone from walking down the sidewalk by parking a motorhome in their path.
# In Temperance, MS, you can’t walk a dog without dressing it in diapers.
# In Oxford, Miss., it’s illegal to “create unnecessary noises.”
# It is illegal for a male to be sexually aroused in public.
# It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session.
# Oxford: It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session. One may not spit on the sidewalks on the square. Motor vehicles on the square are prohibited. Horn honking is not permitted as it might scare horses.
# Tylertown: It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street.
# Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
# Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
# Vagrancy is punishable by either 30 days in prison or a $201 fine.

Missouri
# Anyone under the age of 21 who takes out household trash containing even a single empty alcohol beverage container can be charged with illegal possession of alcohol in Missouri.
# Buckner: In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.
# Children can buy shotguns in Kansas City, Missouri… but not toy cap guns.
# Excelsior Springs: Hard objects may not be thrown by hand. Worrying squirrels is not tolerated.
# Four women may not rent an apartment together.
# Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
# In Ballwin, Mo., the only place you can use vulgar, obscene or indecent language is in your home.
# In Merryville women are prohibited from wearing corsets because “the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male.”
# In Springfield, door to door salesman are prohibited from selling their goods while standing in the middle of the road, screaming at passing vehicles.
# In St. Louis, it’s illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.
# In St. Louis, a law on the books makes it illegal to park your car without turning off the engine. This was to avoid scaring horses.
# It is illegal to have oral sex.
# It is not illegal to speed.
# It’s illegal to sit on any street curb in St. Louis, Missouri, and drink beer from a bucket.
# Kansas City: Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely. Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.
# Marceline: Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
# Marquette: It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).
# Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
# Minors in Kansas City, Missouri, are not allowed to purchase cap pistols; they may buy shotguns freely, however.
# Mole: Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.
# Natchez: It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.
# Purdy: Dancing is strictly prohibited.
# St. Louis: It’s illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets. A milk man may not run while on duty.
# University City: Four women may not rent an apartment together.

Montana
# It is a felony for a wife to open her husband’s mail.
# It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
# In Billings, Montana it is illegal for employees of the city’s communications center to program their phones with speed dial.
# Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
# It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime in Montana.
# Bozeman has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown — if they’re nude.
# Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party and it is legal to shoot them.
# It is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex in any other position other than missionary style. In Montana, it is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.
# It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime.
# It is a felony for a wife to open her husband’s mail.
# It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
# Excelsior Springs: Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
# Helena: No item may be thrown across a street.
# Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can’t dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
# Salisbury: Pop bottles are not to be thrown on the ground.
# Whitehall: It is illegal to operate a vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.
# Montana just legalized the production of caviar.

Nebraska
# A man is not allowed to run around with a shaved chest.
# A parent can be arrested if her/his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service.
# Barbers are forbidden by law from shaving a man’s chest in Omaha, Nebraska.
# If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.
# In the fine state of Nebraska, it is not legal for a tavern owner to serve beer unless a nice kettle of soup is also brewing.
# It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license.
# It is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.
# It is Illegal to go whale fishing.
# It is illegal to sleep naked in a hotel/ motel room.
# Lehigh: Doughnut holes may not be sold
# Omaha: Sneezing or burping is illegal during a church service.
# The owner of every hotel in Hastings is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.
# Waterloo: Barbers are forbidden from eating onions between 7 A.M. and 7 P.M.

Nevada
# A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people other than himself at any one period during the day.
# Clark County: An ordinance makes bringing a concealable fire arm into the county illegal unless it is registered with the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department. In order to register a handgun, however, it must be brought in to the police station. Furthermore, you may not register a gun on the weekends, but the police may prosecute you at that time.
# Elko: Everyone walking the streets is required to wear a mask.
# Eureka: Men who wear moustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
# In Eureka, Nevada men who have mustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
# In Las Vegas, Nevada: It’s against the law to pawn your dentures.
# In Las Vegas you can bet on any team–except The University of Nevada at Las Vegas.
# In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.
# In Nevada until the 1960s it was illegal to sell liquor at religious camp meetings, within a half-mile of the state prison, in the State Capitol Building or to imbeciles.
# In Reno, Nevada staging a marathon dance is illegal, although posting a notice on a fire hydrant about illegal dance marathons is not.
# In the old days in Nevada a man caught beating his wife was tied to a stake for eight hours a day with a sign that read, “Wife Beater” fastened to his chest.
# It’s illegal in Nevada to have a “house of ill fame” within 400 yards of a church or school.
# It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
# It is illegal in Reno, Nevada to conceal a spray-painted shopping cart in your basement.
# It’s still “legal” to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.
# Nyala: A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people other than himself at any one period during the day.
# Saloonkeepers had to post the names of habitual drunkards if so requested by the local sheriff or members of the imbibers’ immediate families.

New Hampshire
# Any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted with a device to gather its feces.
# If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter, hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for ”maintaining the national forest without a permit”.
# In New Hampshire it is illegal to inhale bus fumes with the intent of inducing euphoria.
# In New Hampshire you are prohibited from pawning the clothes off your back to pay off gambling debts.
# It is considered an offense to check into a hotel under an assumed name.
# It is illegal to pick seaweed up off of the beach.
# New Hampshire law forbids you to tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a tavern, restaurant, or cafe.
# On Sundays citizens may not relieve themselves while looking up.
# White Mountain Nat. Forest: If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter, hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for ”maintaining the national forest without a permit”.
# You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing to pay off a gambling debt.
# You may not run machinery on Sundays.

New Jersey
# Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.
# Bernards Township: It is illegal to frown as the town is a “Frown-Free Town Zone”.
# Caldwell: You may not dance or wear shorts on the main avenue.
# Car dealerships are forbidden from opening on Sunday.
# Cranford: Citizens are not permitted to park their own boat on their lawn.
# Cresskill: All cats must wear three bells to warn birds of their whereabouts.
# Elizabeth: It is forbidden for a woman, on a Sunday, to walk down Broad Street without wearing a petticoat.
# If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated, you may never again apply for personalized license plates.
# In Berkley Heights you may not walk your cattle on the street on Sunday.
# In Newark it is illegal to buy ice cream after 6:00 p.m.
# In New Jersey it is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.
# In New Jersey, it is illegal to slurp soup.
# It’s illegal in New Jersey for parents to give their children under the age of 18 even a sip of alcohol.
# It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
# It is against the law to “frown” at a police officer.
# It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.
# It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals at the local zoo.
# It’s also illegal in this state to throw a bad pickle on the street.
# Lovers in Liberty Corner should avoid satisfying their lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.
# Manville: It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals a the local zoo.
# Newark: It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm, unless the customer has a note from his doctor.
# Ocean City: People may not slurp their soup. Pinball machines are not to be played on Sunday. Raw hamburger may not be sold.
# On a highway you can not park under a bridge.
# Raritan: Profanity is prohibited.
# Raw hamburger may not be sold.
# Sea Isle City: There will be no boiling of bones on the property.
# There is no horse racing allowed on the New Jersey Turnpike.
# Trenton: You may not throw a bad pickle in the street. Pickles are not to be consumed on Sundays.
# Unless you have a doctor’s note, it’s illegal to buy ice cream after 6 PM in Newark, New Jersey.
# You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service and full service only.
# You may not slurp your soup.

New Mexico
# A city council member in Albuquerque, N.M., introduced a resolution a few years ago to ban Santa Claus from the city. The matter was defeated.
# Carrizozo: It’s forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.
# Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.
# In Albuquerque, New Mexico it is illegal for cab drivers to reach out and pull potential customers into their cabs.
# In Carlsbad it’s legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to stop strangers from peeking in.
# In recent years, several efforts have been made to legalize camel racing and ostrich racing in New Mexico, but to no avail. Those bills were defeated, but the legislature recently allowed gambling on bicycle races.
# It’s forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.
# Las Cruces: You may not carry a lunchbox down Main Street.
# State officials ordered 400 words of “sexually explicit material” to be cut from Romeo and Juliet.

How to Survive (Almost) Anything 14 Survival Skills

The tips assembled here will change the way you approach each and every day—and help you survive a particularly bad one.
by Laurence Gonzalessurvival 425 How to Survive (Almost) Anything 14 Survival Skills

1. Do the Next Right Thing

“Debriefings of survivors show repeatedly that they possess the capacity to break down the event they are faced with into small, manageable tasks,” writes John Leach, a psychology professor at Lancaster University who has conducted some of the only research on the mental, emotional, and psychological elements of survival. “Each step, each chunk must be as simple as possible…. Simple directed action is the key to regaining normal psychological functioning.” This approach can sometimes seem counterintuitive. And yet almost any organized action can help you recover the ability to think clearly and aid in your survival. For example, Pvt. Giles McCoy was aboard the U.S.S. Indianapolis when it was torpedoed and sank at the end of World War II, tossing some 900 men into the black of night and the shark-infested Pacific. McCoy, a young Marine, was sucked under the boat and nearly drowned. He surfaced into a two-inch-thick slick of fuel oil, which soaked his life vest and kept him from swimming—although he could see a life raft, he couldn’t reach it. So he tore off his vest and swam underwater, surfacing now and then, gasping, swallowing oil, and vomiting. After getting hoisted onto the raft, he saw a group of miserable young sailors covered in oil and retching. One was “so badly burned that the skin was stripped from his arms,” Doug Stanton writes in his gripping account of the event, In Harm’s Way. McCoy’s response to this horrific situation was telling. “He resolved to take action: He would clean his pistol.” Irrelevant as that task may sound, it was exactly the right thing to do: organized, directed action. He made each one of the sailors hold a piece of the pistol as he disassembled it. This began the process of letting him think clearly. Forcing your brain to think sequentially—in times of crisis and in day-to-day life—can quiet dangerous emotions. [Read more…]

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