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20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over

 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over

20. I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.

19. Sorry officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.

18. Aren’t you the guy from the villiage people?

17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.

16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

14. Bad cop. No donut.

13. You’re not going to check the trunk, are you?

12. Gee, that gut sure doesn’t inspire confidence.

11. Didn’t I see you get your b**t kicked on cops?

10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

9. I pay your salary!

8. So uh, you on the take or what?

7. Gee officer, that’s terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.

6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that’s how far they are ahead of me.

4. What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.

3. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of cr**k, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.

2. Hey, is that a 9mm? That’s nothing compared to this 44 magnum.

1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full c***ty searches?

Comments

  1. jesus christ says:

    What the hell is up with the censorship.. You censored cavity? Really?

  2. why is the word butt and cavity censored?

  3. and crack as well
    like fuck

  4. very funny stuff, will have to try when i get pulled over lol

  5. crack but hell coon shit dog ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  6. wtf bitch says:

    whoever wrote these is a moron who thinks he is funny but isn’t…

  7. eat shit, wtf bitch says:

    so you wrote huh, wtf bitch. faggot

  8. GabachoMike says:

    Why bother talking to a cop at all?

    Just give them the required paperwork:

    – license

    – registration

    – proof of insurance

    …and let them do their thing – but NEVER agree to any search.

    Here’s a Law Professor who recommends NEVER talking to police (NO matter HOW ‘innocent’ you think you may be)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wXkI4t7nuc

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